More Change

So after having a good long weekend there is nothing like showing up Monday morning and finding that your student, who you were told would be starting at their new school, is still here. I have nothing personal against the kid, I understand the level of his disability and that he is largely unaccountable for what he does, but for crying out loud, can't people get their stuff together and just do their job? Honestly.

But on another and not completely unrelated note, a rather big development has been thrown into this process of deciding on a career and graduate school.

Our team has been together for over a year and has had wonderful success with the kids in our classroom. But after what we have gone through with two students this year, and at least five others in the past, we have all been forced and weigh our options. A very significant factor that we have to consider is safety. When our kids loose their temper it is intense, and the potential for serious injury is great even when you are a 6'3" male (me), who weighs 260, who also has received assault, training and has extensive experience in how to deal violently aggressive behavior. Does anyone want to deal with the possibility of being seriously and even permanently hurt, while being an educator, on a daily basis especially when you are on your own at times? Collectively and individually we decided no.

Individually and collectively we are thankful for the wonderful opportunity we have had to work together, but are aware that malevolent forces beyond our control are putting all of us at serious risk, namely delusional parents and negligent behavior support specialists who are responsible for putting the extremely violent kids in the public schools. We are also thankful for all the experiences that we have had, both the good and the bad that collectively is the wonderful year and a half we have all had.

Our lead was waiting for a sign what to do next year, and then it came. A position opened up in the form of a new mild classroom in our department. For her, it was the pillar of light in the grove. She took this as the sign. Because I was going back to school and another our team members will be student teaching next year, the remaining member of our team and our lead decided to put in for a transfer and move to the new classroom.

I am at peace with this. It is never realistic to believe that things will never change, that our best efforts, by themselves, can stop the relentless march of time or even change the world. If anything this has opened up new possibilities and has turned me on to things that I have wanted to do for years but never had the necessary confidence to even try. If anything it is for me a sign that it is time to moveon.org.

From all of this I have learned the importance of listening to promptings, responding to the almost imperceptible tugs and nudges, that many call providence. I never would have taken this job in the first place had I not listened to some profound prompting I had a year ago.

As Joseph Campbell put it:

It is miraculous. I even have a superstition that has grown on me as a result of invisible hands coming all the time - namely, that if you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. When you can see that, you begin to meet people who are in your field of bliss, and they open doors to you. I say, follow your bliss and don't be afraid, and doors will open where you didn't know they were going to be. My general formula for my students is "Follow your bliss." Find where it is, and don't be afraid to follow it.